Comments on: Stuck on “tent duty” in the kingdom of God

By: Basil Smith

Basil Smith — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 09:34:17 +0000

I certainly feel for you Kathy, I’m not unfamiliar with your trauma. Some time ago my similar frustration was relieved when I found my heart bursting forth in an unfamiliar language which I feel is the language of the Spirit within. It helps me. Another way to not feel helpless is to pray for revival, because the real cause of our trauma is the deadness and unreality of the church in general. That too can help.
Best wishes

By: kathy

kathy — Thu, 15 Oct 2009 12:18:18 +0000

I think of Joseph and Moses often. They both felt they had an important future. But one ends up in captivity and the other in exile. They must have despaired and gone through depression and dissapointment during these times. Their hearts hungered for the will of God but were probably brought to points of questioning what they had believed about their purposes in life. Now we see that their “tent duty” was part of God’s perfect plan. But when I myself suffer in captivity and exile, and my heart burns and cries out to be serving my LORD, it is absolute agony. Because the desire to serve Him won’t go away. And people just don’t seem to understand what I’m going through. They try to console and convince me that I’m serving God right where I am and to be satisfied with that.I’ve tried to kill the hunger, the passion, the vision and the dream within me. But it won’t die. And it’s tormenting to be in these shoes. It causes me to doubt what is within me. Am I crazy? Am I making up this desire from a sinful state? Or is this longing really from God and will He make it come to pass? All it involves is proclaiming His name, proclaiming His love, proclaiming His kingdom, proclaiming His word, proclaiming His absolute beauty and setting the captives free and motivating the Church onward unto the fullness of Christ. My heart does not stop crying out for day and night whether sleeping or awake. And yet I feel I’m in a cell and in the desert. And frankly I cannot face the thought that these desires will not come to pass. Because it will seem worse then death to me. If this desire that has been with me is not from God I wish He would just take it away from me. Because it is absolute torment.

By: Julia Berger

Julia Berger — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 19:11:21 +0000

I’ve been studying psychology for years, and I could not see a point in it until I got to your website. I was now trying to start to study theology instead. However, God has already told me He wants me to become a psychologist. Psychologists are not allowed to profess their faith on duty. However, I’m a witness. There must be a point in entering such an acknowledged profession. I am sure now God will lead me on- with or without an additional degree in theology.